Bent on Resolute’s

By Allan Njorah,

We are just a few days to 2019 and this being the new year I know most of you have made several resolutions which they have vowed to follow to the latter changing their life for the better. To me this this is somehow funny ideal as January does not mean much to me. You see, my resolutions were made in beginning of November 2018 and you can as well say that was my January. Sound crazy right? Hell, yeah, I know that. But this is not the point of the article so let’s get the ink rolling with the top 4 resolution made in an effort to collect the Holiday vices, misgivings and poor judgments.

Photo by chuttersnap

  1. Hitting the GYM.

This is probably the first resolution to many especially after over indulging in chips, kuku, nyama choma from Naivasha and drowning a whole tank of Guinness Kubwa. Gluttony is a deadly sin in the eyes of the Lord. However, this was completely ignored by millions of Kenyans regardless of the fact that their Holiday revolved around our Lords Birthday. This is the month where gym subscription will go over the roof as hundreds try to shed some few pounds cursing the pain in their joint by bending and lifting while the gym owners and instructors laugh all the way to the bank. Many will leave the activity after several attempts though and decide fasting is better and healthier than the pain. After All lifting like a beast is not for the faint of heart.

Photo by Jesper Aggergaard

  1. Getting Saved and Attending Church Services.

‘It’s time we get closer to the Lord for keeping us safe through all our journeys to and from Diani, Country side and the wedding parties’, will be heard from many as they storm churches and sing praise and worship on top of their lungs. Despite churches being full house, the local priests will be a sad lot as the offering will be like river Tana during draught, nothing to smile about. The loud voices will be to compensate for the empty pockets as church turns from a house of the lord to a hide out from the Landlord, no pun intended.

  1. Save Money/ Spend Less.

This is the perfect time people will probably realize the reason Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert Kiosaki was a best seller as they try to save the little left. The cars hired for December are no longer on tarmac. The “weka mafuta hadi itapike” (full tank) clue are nowhere to be seen as they take matatus and route 11 to work. Butcheries and Pubs are a ghost of their previous months and the live green movements will be on its all-time high.

  1. Break Up to Make Up.

Baba Watoto is finally home after being swallowed by the proverbial Jonah’s fish for a full month. This is the time he begs for forgiveness from the loyal wife as he blames it on the devil and swears never to abandon his beloved family. What he won’t admit is all the sexcapades with the mistresses and slay-queens and the plots sold for trips to Dubai. As the wife welcomes the prodigal husband the mistresses will be nursing broken hearts and lonely night and probably a fatherless baby on the way. I guess we can’t all have our cakes and eat them too.

Photo by Paul Garaizar

Look whatever Atonement you are going through, just sit tight, the 90 days of January will be over eventually. A little depression, brokenness and heartbreak won’t be the end of the world. Don’t take your life though, when you feel you can’t handle it seek friends or professional help.

Allan Njoorah

Allan Njoorah

A blogger, a writer and a poet full of old-man wisdom. Follow me on

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